Trigonometry

© Words and music by Ray Scudero. All rights reserved.

Arithmetic was easy for me: add, subtract, divide.
Multiplying came a little tougher through my hide.
Geometry was fascinating; I loved the logic train,
But then came trigonometry and knots tied in my brain.

(Chorus)
Golly gee, trigonometry!
Golly gee, trigonometry—
I don’t know how to solve the problem; maybe I’d better quit trigonometry,
Got a hold on me.

Quadratics were a quandary and to factor was a chore.
Plotting graphs was nifty but logarithms were a bore.
The differences between two squares was ninety miles of what?
I couldn't grasp the concepts and the rules confused a lot.

(Chorus)

Last week I fell in love with someone head-on over heels;
Last night someone else revealed the love her heart conceals.
The first one’s got a good thing going with another guy.
My heart’s in a quadratic jumble—this is why I cry:

(Chorus)

The formula that’s needed is the one that I can’t find;
The roots of all the integers conspire to blow my mind.
The x and y and z of it are things about which I quip,
But the other side of the equals sign is nothing more than zip.

(Chorus)

This situation’s got me just a bit weak in the knees.
I guess that there’s no future when you’re stuck in parentheses.
So I ran it through the computer and there’s just one thing I see:
The only common factor running through this mess is me.

(Chorus)
Golly gee, trigonometry!
Golly gee, trigonometry—
I don’t know how to solve the problem; maybe I’d better quit trigonometry,
Got a hold on me.




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